Don’t scold me

Honest to pete, I am convinced Life is out to get me. I had Blue out at Padden yesterday and we were putzing along happily. I’ve been going out there less frequently after hurting my knee in the summer, and I miss it. We’re moseying along when suddenly, my right foot hit a loose rock (sound familiar?). I almost recovered with my left foot, but a leaf slipped sideways and another rock, well, rocked, and that undid me. Boom, down I went.

I am fine. Not to worry. I’m immobilized for a few days, but nothing major.

I had to sit there for a few minutes before I could tell whether I was going to be able to walk, during which time I swore loudly and inventively. It’s funny how the EMT training kicks in immediately: Breathing? Check. Heartbeat? Check. Severe point pain? Not quite. Wait for the initial wave to subside and then reassess, while excoriating whatever Evil caused this to happen. I mean, come on, it is Not Fair. Twelve years I’ve been walking that trail and I’ve never fallen until this year, and now twice? Crap!

Three kind women came along shortly and helped me get upright. Both ankles hurt like he!! and had quite astonishing swelling already (five minutes, maybe?), but I could tell I’d be able to get back to the car, drive home, and get into the house if I did it quickly before the initial misery subsided and they started to stiffen. One of them, bless her heart, stayed with me until I got back to the car. Her dog, Milo, a huge happy golden, had decided that I was sitting on the ground for his entertainment and was trying to bump me around ’til she came around the corner and caught him. Maybe she was atoning for that. 😀

The other two women said they’d had falls or near-falls at the park this year, too. So maybe it’s not just me; there are a lot more loose stones around than usual. Or maybe they were just trying to make me feel better. Either way, I am Most Royally Pissed Off.

Got home and got some of my groceries and the dog downstairs, sat down on the recliner with ice, and called my friend Rick to come rescue me. He brought the rest of the groceries down and put the perishables in the fridge, then we watched a couple of Buster Keaton movies. He went back home and brought me his crutches (I seem to remember lending mine to someone a few years ago, but can’t remember who), and they make a huge difference. So today, I am ensconced on the bed, eating cereal out of the box and drinking milk out of a water bottle, scarfing ibuprofen and icing everything, and trying not to be angry. My knitting project bags are turning out to be great for packing stuff from one room to another, carried in my teeth a la Saint Bernard rescue dogs.

Posted by wordsmith

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Believe me, I have (nor had) NO INTENTION of falling down. I think Andi’s right; it makes no sense that it should be I to whom this keeps happening. I suppose it might be happening to other people and I just never hear about it, but it’s really ticking me off. I’m seriously considering not walking back there anymore, which would be terribly sad because it’s a great walk and Blue loves the freedom of racing up and down the hills and rocks and logs. But yeezles, what the heck is going on?

Perhaps I’ll take a bit of wine and cheese back there, as Andi suggests, to see if that will appease the Gods of Rocks-In-Motion. Criminies.

Better today. Walked across an entire room without crutches. Sigh.

I am glad your okay mother, no more falling though. Okay?

I will not scold, but I will “Tsk tsk” disapprovingly.

Tsk tsk.

And I bet you can’t wait until you’re using your knitting project bags to carry your dentures around in your gums a la old toothless Saint Bernard rescue dogs. You’re already getting the “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!” thing down.

Love you Ma, and I’m glad some good Samaritans helped you up, and you didn’t have anything broken enough to seriously lay you up.

No scolding, but a good amount of pondering shall be done on how you can appease the nature gods, whom you must have seriously offended. Maybe bring some bread, cheese and wine to leave beneath a tree next time? Or maybe just some cheery whistling and story telling? No matter what, I wish you a speedy recovery,.

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