‘Sweet li’l movie wif a coupla ghosts. . . ‘

Yeah, mmm-hmmm. Haven’t I heard this before?

Friend of mine was watching a movie the other day (The Eclipse) and told me it was, well, what the headline says. He knows my dislike of horror films. “They’re not bad ghosts like a horror film,” he said. “It was a sweet story and the ghosts weren’t very scary, they just popped up three or four times.”

I hear this as “the ghosts are the usual, semitransparent, and they just kind of drift around.” So while I’m communing with my nightly ice, I pull the movie up on Netflix. It goes along nicely, etc., until suddenly

SHRIEK! JUMP!

a ghost pops up, complete with facial lesions, stark staring black eyes, an’ general gharstliness.

Well, OK, not scary, exactly, but certainly startling. Movie goes on, man goes over to the closet and gets down on his hands and knees to look at a shoe. The music becomes the Kyrie section of a Latin mass, sung to wobbly music. He touches the shoe and

SHRIEK! JUMP! KNITTING NEEDLES FLY ACROSS ROOM!

said ghost pops up out of the floor and tries to drag the poor wee man down into. . . someplace dark and icky, I guess. O’ course, you know what’s coming now, an’ the next time the music involves the Kyrie, you get suspicious. But it’s longer than you expect and you’ve relaxed your guard before

SHRIEK! JUMP! LAPTOP BOUNCES OFF ONTO BED!

the damn ghost pops up again. Well, crap, and you thought you were ready for that one.

He said three or four times, and the fourth time did not involve either lesions, blackened eyes, or gharstliness, so it didn’t get a shriek or a jump. So I got through the movie.

However, it may be a while before I can hear the Kyrie without apprehension.

Posted by wordsmith

0 comments

LOL! You have a cruel streak, medear! Not gonna be happenin’, I finks, huh-uh. I s’pose I might consider the aerobic benefits, given the present state of immobility, but still. . .

I want to take you to a horror movie. I have a friend I enjoy taking, because she’s more fun to watch than the movie. The full head down, fingers over the eyes, jumping out of her chair, shrieking louder than the sound system, squirming and exclaiming, “Oh God, oh God, oh holy FU**,” reaction. It’s great.

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